Five days until my due date, although the margin of error for our due date considering the first ultrasound we had is 4-5 days, our doctor tells us....soooooooooo. Now? Or five days after the 23rd? How are my hormones supposed to handle this kind of spectrum?

I feel like a crazy person. But that's okay. I would explain, but that would entail me listing the entire dictionary of possible human emotions.

I've been having the most bizarre dreams at night (when I can sleep) and also craving the crappiest foods ever to eat which is not my norm. Chris doesn't judge me, unless he's secretly judging me and not telling me because I'm a hormonal mess. Just kidding, he doesn't judge me as long as he gets to join in. For instance, the other day all I wanted to eat was chocolate. We had none. We legitimately made dark chocolate frosting from scratch and we ate it. Not with spoons, don't worry. We dipped apples in it. Ha! I never have a sweet tooth! It's fine. I'm just going to have to bust it as soon as I am able. I told myself I would not even allow myself to drive to my gym once I can go again-I will force myself to RUN there. (Not super impressive when you find out it's only a half mile away.)

All this rambling to say- we are trying to wait patiently and I am not going to be offended if Elsie comes way late. Although I miss the ability to get in and out of bed in a timely manner and without grunting, I so enjoy this time with her. I had a rough week last week at the 38 week mark, remembering how we went in with Ellie for the c-section..and subsequently had to plan her funeral service..and that brought me up to week 39 with Elsie, where I remembered that Ellie was no longer in my womb. It sure put the discomforts of pregnancy into new light.

I am happy that Elsie is coming on her own terms, and happy that we still have the opportunity to pray. Don't give up, people. Never give up.